Me again. My husband and I have been talking a lot about if/why college is important to us, so I’ll try to clarify again.
It’s kind of funny that I’ve been an advocate for alternatives to college here, because it wasn’t but a month ago on my local homeschooling group that I was emphasizing the IMPORTANCE of college. It’s a different group. There they had the same argument, that college is the new high school, but with a different twist. High school is what people do because they have to. We weren’t very impressed by a lot of our peers in college. It’s something a lot of youth here do because they have to, and sadly, that undermines the value of a degree to some point. A college degree is essential in the corporal world, but it isn’t enough to ensure success. There’s something to be said for learning to comply and jump through hoops to get things done as well. My dad and his brothers had a family business. Sadly his parents didn’t think college was that valuable and they didn’t encourage their kids to get a degree because they had a family business and thought their kids wouldn’t need it. It was a successful family business and all of them were able to provide for their families. However, it was my dad and his one brother that did get a degree- in spite of parents who wanted them to work the business instead- that took the business to the next level. My dad’s inventions are the best selling products, and my uncle’s business sense and diplomacy in Asia, particularly Indonesia were what took the business to the next level, and everybody benefited. My dad’s degree was in public speaking, not chemistry, but he learned how to research and study in college and part-way through his masters, and that SKILL is what helped him in his business.
There was a girl that liked my husband quite a lot who wanted to be a homemaker She didn’t think it was important to go to school. She graduated from high school and started working at Pizza Hut. He wasn’t very interested in her. Frankly, I went to school to get an MRS degree. My plan A was to get married as soon as possible and start a family. But I didn’t get married right away and ended up getting married with just a year left of school. I did have a plan B for a successful life where I could provide for myself and live a life of purpose. That’s the key, I think. I studied hard and I was a good student. I recognized that if I wanted to marry a prince, so to speak, I would have to be a princess. Education was, is, and always will be very important to me. Why else would I spend so many hours teaching my kids? My husband recognized that, and he found that attractive. He wanted a wife who would stay home with the kids, but he also wanted a wife that he could have an intelligent conversation with. I like to think I fit the bill. I also have a skill I could use to provide for our family, if need be, and that brings us a lot of peace of mind. If needed, I wouldn’t apply for a job, I would create a piano studio. I made pretty good money teaching before I had my degree with a skill I learned before college, and while I could charge more because of my degree and certainly am a better teacher for it, I did have that skill when I graduated from high school. I still think I would have been a well-prepared wife right out of high school. It’s nice to have that piece of paper, but if I had to go back I would have done just what I did- go to school to get an MRS degree.
I like that people have mentioned “college or a trade”. My sister hasn’t gone to college, but she has traveled internationally three times to volunteer to speak English, and she speaks Chinese now- something that, for the right job, would look just as or more appealing to an employer than that piece of paper. She’s saving up to become a midwife (ie, a trade). She is doing amazing things with her life. My husband said that if he was still single, a young lady like that wouldn’t be any less appealing to him than a girl going to school.
My sons WILL need to know how to earn money well, period. That’s plan A and B, whether they get married or not. My girls might be single their whole life or need to provide for a family for unknown reasons, so they might need a financial career and should be prepared for it. We’ll prepare them for that. The point still remains that ideally they would become a good wife and mother. If they are well educated and learn to value education, I don’t think I’m setting them up for failure with that attitude. I admit that my religion plays a big role in that attitude as well. For my girls, and my boys, I just want them to be happy. I recognize that a superb education brings happiness. It brings financial security. I want that for them, and my husband and I will encourage them to do college, probably online during their teenage years. Happiness also comes from a strong moral foundation and knowing how to work hard and being willing to “take chances, make mistakes, and get messy!”