Using a reward system to motivate 2.5 year old in early learning

Early Learning Early Learning General Discussions
1

Hi everyone,

I am currently toilet training my child and I am using a reward sticker chart for each time she does a no 1 in the toilet and 2 stickers for no 2’s. I am having tremendous success with this tool in getting her to go, I was thinking of taking the reward system with her learning programs. She has become a bit resistant to anything mathematical. I have tried teaching her teddies, using a puppet, making games every trick in the book. She told the puppet today that she only likes words not maths :frowning: so I thought of using a reward chart to get her interested in maths but I have some pro’s and con’sto this method.

(CONS)

  1. Early learning should be because they want to do it not because they have to do it (but she does need some mathematic training )
  2. She learns only what she has to learn to get the sticker and later prize
  3. There is no real joy in learning.

(PROS)

  1. Its enough to get her started and she learns to enjoy math
  2. There is consistancy in the program because we do something small every day and she gets rewarded for it.
  3. She eventually forgets to ask for the sticker (like she forgot twice today for the sticker when she went to the loo)
  4. Once established this becomes a part of her everyday life like a routine and she accepts it as her day to day life rather than not wanting to do it at all and never getting any where with any maths because we are constantly stop starting.

I would love to hear all opinions.

Kim

2

I personally recommend against rewards for learning. Here’s one side of the argument - http://www.alfiekohn.org/teaching/pdf/Punished%20by%20Rewards.pdf

3

Oh, but I do have some other ideas. :slight_smile:

Take a break for a short bit.

Do math yourself, where she can see. I do a suduko every morning while my kids have the option of doing some math sheets of their own.

For the part of the daily routine bit you mentioned, I’ve had success pairing the undesirable bits with the most desirable part of the day. Not as a reward, and for us, the two aren’t absolutely linked. I have my 4 year old read me a book between dinner and desert. And I read to him during desert. But if he said he didn’t want to, I’d shelve the books for bit. And then we’d still have desert while I read to him.

Maybe after a short break, you’ll find some new way that works for you two.

4

I read Unconditional parenting that both rewards and punishment are not good mostly for the same reasons sited by Mackenzie.
Nevertheless I have been using for more than a year now a copybook where i write once in a while any good activity done by my grandson and place a sticker by its side. It is like a diary but not that frequently. The think is that lately my grandson asks me to write something good that he dictates me and he gets to choose the sticker he wants.
I do not see this exactly as a reward but it is a nice time we share and later on will have a good time reading back and recalling those times. It is also like a milestone record done in a copybook.

5

Thanks Mackenzie and 2010. What you have both said was my gut feeling anyway. I just thought I would ask the question and see what people’s opinion was. I am finding other ways :slight_smile:

6

We have been doing hooked on phonics workbooks since DD was around 20-22 months or so. They have the book set up so every couple of pages, the child gets a star sticker when they complete certain task. For DD, it worked really well to give her a sticker on every single page and then just buy a bunch of extra fun stickers to keep her interest.

It’s become part of the routine. She still regularly asks to do the program and it has helped her reading stamina tremendously. While I love the Montessori philosophy and am looking to enroll DD in a Montessori school soon, I figure she’ll get enough of it at school and this little bit of rewarding isn’t going to permanently damage her. We both have fun with it, and I think the benefits have far outweighed the negatives. But, that is just my opinion as one parent, and I don’t follow any one system 100%, Montessori or otherwise. I definitely respect parents that find other ways to make it work, but it’s just a no-big-deal part of our program at this point, a fun little step that she looks forward to. In the beginning, it helped capture her attention and get the ball rolling, it’s probably not even needed anymore, it’s just something fun to do.

7

I do use rewards but some of them are not what people might always consider rewards - for example my daughter resists reading to me sometimes so before I shelve it I try: well if you read this page then we can act it out afterwards and she loves acting so it works and she’ll read a page. There is not that much difference between that and getting a sticker - if she still wasn’t keen I wouldn’t force her. I’m not terribly keen on doing my continuous development reading for my profession but the thought I could lose my job and the money that buys me my “rewards” is enough to make me do it and it isn’t so bad - I may even like it some nights and I am an adult. Most of my “learning” is for a purpose with a reward - just reading gives me the reward of relaxation - something a child needs to learn about.