teaching 2.5 year old to read - feeling stuck and demoralised

Hi All

Would really appreciate some support and ideas. I’ve been diligently teaching my now 29 month old DD since 4 months! We started with YBCR and then LR and have been through both semesters, which we finished about 4 or 5 months ago. We’ve been teaching once or twice a day and usually 4 days per week to fit with my part-time work commitments. I started fleschcards on powerpoint and run through one set per week, plus we look at the wonderful Starfall (she only likes the alphabet ones - not the stories at the moment). I’ve made a few story powerpoints using cartoon characters, which she does enjoy but I don’t really have time right now to make lots more as I have a new baby aged 7 weeks, sleep is at a premium and my brain is a bit tired and foggy. We also watch an episode of your child can read maybe 2-3 times a week.

We also try to do a short segment of a language DVD (little pim or whistlefritz for french and spanish), plus a very very short segment of LM (not equations which she hates!). We also play with numicon for maths, which is actually going quite well at the moment.

When I read all the amazing progress made by many others on this forum, I do feel a bit (a lot!!) demoralized. I try really hard to make it fun, we always stop if she wants to and I don’t really test. Many others seem to be reading new words far earlier than this and DD is not at all keen on this - I don’t think she can decode, for example with the fleschcards I sometimes ask but she rarely knows (or at least is not willing to divulge) the answer.

We have now run through semester one again to pass the time and are now re-starting semester 2 of LR, just picking out various topics of interest. We have looked at many other LR files, but she is a bit fussy about which she is interested in now, and seems to prefer ones she has seen before rather than completely new ones. She has very strong opinions about what she wants to watch!!

I have been teaching for 2 years now and has it achieved anything???!! I know she does recognise numbers up to 10 and can count to 20 (plus in Spanish and French up to 10), and does know some words by sight but not necessarily in a different context to what she is used to seeing. She also recognises most of the alphabet. But what now? Have I wasted all this time? I am worried I have bored her and this is worse than not having taught at all? I really dont know what to do.

Please help :frowning:

I think you may be surprised that DD knows more then she is sharing. At the very least you have introduced her to a pretty good vocabulary.

I would recommend continuing with the whole words as you are doing, but now maybe also try adding in some phonics. Try the letter factory, and meet the letters. Once she knows her letter and letter sounds you can try something like “The ordinary parents guide to teaching reading” starting after the letter recognition section. That combined with knowledge of Dolch sight words (“Meet the sight words” is good for that) should propel her into reading simple books like Bob books and the earliest easy readers. Take heart though these kind of things go in spurts. No apparent gain for months and then huge leaps and bounds.

lpz11,

Don’t feel demoralized. Your DD knows a lot more than average 2.5 yrs old kids and even more than average 4 yrs old kids. I agree with others that she might know more than she is expressing. Suddenly one day she will start reading independently and you will be so happy. In the meanwhile it sounds like you are doing a wonderful job of providing an enriched environment. It felt like my daughter stagnated forever. Now she reads anything she wants independently. She is 4 yrs old (in pre-k) and reads on a second or third grade level. I used to feel like I was doing something wrong and we weren’t making enough progress. Then suddenly she was reading - a whole new level of learning through reading opened up. I recognize that there are younger readers here that are more accomplished than my daughter. However, I am so happy and amazed by my daughter that comparisons feel unnecessary. My daughter was not more advanced than yours. Just hang in there. One day you will feel like all of your hard work has paid off and multiplied.

Lori

First, Congratulations! You’ve been doing a great job! And a lot! I agree, probably she knows more than she shares. It was/is always like that with my son. For me, one of the main things is schedule. He knows what’s next: morning a few minutes of PPTs new words and reading at least one book. Lunch time: You tube different phonics videos. In the evening his choice of Your Child can read or Meet the Phonics (that was a big hit from the very beginning). He loves them. In the evening we aso read books. I know it’s not easy and takes the whole day to get ready with the presentations, find new ideas to make it more interesting…but I believe that it worth the effort.
My son is almost the same age, 33 months and even though he reads pretty well, never wants to read without me. Just lately he started that he wanted to point to the words he reads and started to find end read letters and words everywhere we go. He loves spelling the words he sees.
What I want to say is that every kid is different. Don’t worry and try to enjoy every moment with her when you learn new things together. And keep doing your amazing job!

I highly recommend that you download Funnix for Reading. It is just a point and click program for you (since you are a tired mommy of an infant too). Just hold the baby in your lap and sit beside your daughter at the lunch table. You do the program with your daughter. It is sooo easy and gives a thorough grounding in phonics, even decoding so-called undecodable words with sight words. If you have a little extra time, then download those Flesch cards from Daddude, print them on cardstock, fold, glue and cut - don’t even bother to laminate, just make sure her hands are clean. Use these with her and put your finger under each letter while sounding it out. These really helped my daughter. I did both slowly sounding them out and flashing them at her.

Don’t feel discouraged! I 've been a teacher all my life and every child is different. Although you found some children here can read very well, I believe there are lots more who don’t do very well at some point in their lives. However, it dosn’t mean they learnt nothing even if they don’t show you results. It’s just that they are not ready to share or they’re not in the mood of sharing. Just be patient and know that a farmer takes a few months to harvest. Learning is a process and it takes time. You’ve been doing a lot and take time to enjoy the process, the result will amaze you one day!

I agree. Don’t feel discouraged or demoralized. The one thing you need to do is take a deep breath and let it all out. All children are different that’s for sure. I have four daughters and each of them have performed at different tasks in their lives in different ways.
It sounds like your daughter doesn’t like to perform. LOL My girls are the same way when their grandparents like to ‘quiz’ them on their multiplication tables. Ugh. They would say " I don’t know." but they knew.

I have read many stories on here with parents who get frustrated and then just one day their child starts reading! So its not at all unusual. I think some children just soak things up first and when they are ready to shine, they do.
My 3rd daughter was this way with speaking. She didn’t speak until she was 4.5 years of age. Why? I don’t know. She was my quiet one ( still is) but she soaked up everything around her. Then one day she started talking and everything she observed while she was quiet she used. She taught herself to swim ( just by watching her big sisters swim), at the age of 3 she was potty trained in 3 days. She is now 8yrs old and is my only one that has had 2nd honors in school. She is very smart. So really, when your daughter is ready to share and shine. She will. Just keep at it. Keep showing her the things she likes. It will help her in the long run. She will eventually switch and start watching something different. Give her , her time to retain the things she wants. If she’s willing to watch the same thing over and over. Then let her for now.

Know that your doing more with your daughter than most parents do. I didn’t know about early reading until I had my last child and she was 4yrs old! I knew no one that had an early reader, well except for one parent, but she said her son just learned to read while watching his sister so I attributed it to high IQ , something 'my girls" didn’t have because they never showed any interest like that at an early age. I never knew you could teach them to read like this. So I came into this very late into the game.
All the children here have started at different times in their lives and different results will vary that’s for sure.

I’ve also seen that some children are more auditory than visual. For those children I believe phonics works well. At 2.5 you could try it and see. But if not I wouldn’t push it to much. Phonics even for an older child can be difficult , unless they are an auditory learner. But you can try.

Just hang in there and no in time your daughter will amaze you in her own time. Just keep doing what your doing.

Thanks everyone, it really does help to have a bit of encouragement.

I took DD for her 2.5 year check up yesterday which she passed very well, and they were very impressed with her vocabulary. When they asked if there was anything else I was worried about, I wanted to say “Yes, she’s not reading yet…!!!” lol but decided probably not wise as they would think I was a crazy person, or at best a horrible pushy mum!!

I think one of the main issues is that DD gets very easily frustrated and angry when she can’t do something easily, or else she likes to do things in her own way, so she is not keen on having too much direction or interference in what she’s doing. I have to work hard to avoid getting into battles about virtually all our daily activities as she does not often want to get dressed, brush hair or teeth, go down stairs, put on jacket etc etc…! She struggles to switch from one activity to another one and her default is ‘No, don’t want to…’ so I guess this also applies to reading. I try to keep things fun but it can be tiring (esp when i’ve not slept well). It can be very frustrating for me - but I also love her spark and her spirit and independence of mind, so I guess these all go hand in hand.

I will certainly try some of the suggestions, and also just keep going onwards as we are, following her lead and trying not to think too much about what will happen next. I’ve always tried to keep it fun and give her as much choice as possible - for example she loves the Starfall alphabet webwsite and choosing which letter she want to see. I have always tried to focus on the process of enjoying our learning together more than end results up until now, so just need to stick with that attitude.

Hi lzp11,

I was in the asme situation until a couple of days ago, when suddenly my son, in an attempt to show off in front of his dad :rolleyes: started reading CVC words :yes: I was surprized because for the past many many months (he knew his letter sounds when he was 26 months) I was trying to teach him blending etc.

Here’s what I did:
I realized I was getting worked up, just like you, and decided to take a break. I read up about other methods and decided to give some basic things a try, not knowing that these would be so important!

  1. I started with the difference between ‘letters’ and 'words
  2. asked him to count ‘letters’ in a ‘word’- he loves counting, so he loved this part :slight_smile:
  3. difference between letter name and sound- so i would pretend to be named ‘letter a’ and say the sound
  4. when reading, before each word i said ‘tell me the sound, not the name’
  5. started with ‘baby words’- 'ca, da, fa…
  6. then the words grew big …cat, fat…i had to build a story around it :slight_smile:
  7. showed him different types of ‘a’

Try these things- maybe they will help.
take care

hi i am desperatly looking for a copy of funnix that was given for free in january . i got it and used it with my daughter , and now that i am ready to use it with her baby brother i just cannot find it on my computer . i did have a crash but i thought i backed up everything , unfortunaly didn’t back up this program . pleeeeeeeeeeeeease , i would love to have it if somebody can send it to me .
hope somebody can help me out .
viv

Have faith, my girl did the same to me, I gave it a rest after a year when she lost interest at age 4, but now she is at school and did the entire primary reading corriculum in one year! She was bored in her first year at school because they went encouraging her to read but in grade 1 ( our first year of REAL learning) she learnt how to read completely! Even her teacher was surprised beyond words. I think my ground work when she was three was worth every effort now! She is a confident well adjusted 8 year old now who can read anything! She now spends her time in class talking! Lol the biggest problem we find now is finding books hard enough with appropriate content!

Like everyone has said: children are all individuals and do things in their own time. My 4 year old has been using LR and other reading materials since she was 8 months old and she is still not terribly keen on reading though she reads at about a first grade level and also never independently. I have found that after a few months of doing one thing she needs a break and then a change so we have to keep changing the way we do reading with her - sometimes reading basic books well below the level she is at and other times harder books, sometimes doing plenty of phonics and other times none. And at 2.5 she was the same - sometimes she only wanted certain words and other times she’d read sentences stuck on the wall and sometimes she wanted nothing at all and we would break for a couple of months before trying again.

And now with my 9 month old I am wondering how she will differ and what she will do and how we will get her reading too - I expect that the journey will be very different to my first child.

sorry my message was not clear , my 5 years old is reading at grade 4-5 level with total comprehension . she loves reading aloud and with wonderful expression . with her he whole word didn’t work , she only picked up on reading by using 100 easy lessons and dad dude cards . now my baby boy knew his letter sounds since he was 18 months , and could sound out some cvc words , but to get him to sit for lwssons from the 100 easy lessons book is not working , he is not ready but he loves everything tha has to do with screen , so i thought i will use funnix with him since it is same approach like the book but on the screen . i don’t have it anymore , i lost it when my computer crashed . can somebody who got it send it to me please .
viv