Sorry to keep pointing back to Janet Lansbury, but she’s been writing about the value of independent play lately, and it really resonates with me. My 3rd child was clingy and didn’t like to be ‘unattached’ from me. My bad, because as I became busier as a mother I would carry her everywhere with me. She was literally attached to me, but for convenience not out of my own beliefs. Philosophically, I’m not a pure AP mom, but I was certainly playing the role. Janet’s advice about fostering independent play http://bit.ly/comtDD really changed my life and my 6-month old’s. She quickly became much more confident on her own and could occupy herself on the floor for over 30-minutes at a time, which allowed me much needed freedom to get some things done and take a personal breath.
I don’t want to debate the pros and cons of Attachment Parenting, because every parent’s style is usually fluid and certainly a personal. But surely, everyone can agree that it’s healthier (and less stressful) if our kids learn from an early age how to occupy and entertain themselves, especially as they begin to enjoy books and learning.
I’m interested in this too. We have a friend whose children always want to be entertained and complain frequently “I’m bored”.
I remember when I said that, my mom found a chore for me to do, so I quickly learned to be otherwise occupied.
I’d be interested what can be done for younger children to help them entertain themselves. I’ve heard of creating 4-5 “stations” where they can do something, and if they get bored, you just move them to the next station for a change of pace. We haven’t done this yet, but I’ve wondered what would be suitable.
The advice referred to in the original post is really for 6mos-3yrs. It’s about establishing the ABILITY to entertain oneself (something I was never able to do… but then, I had 4 brothers so lots of entertainment). If a baby/toddler can be alone to explore, discover, play, that child will certainly be more likely to spend time with books etc…
I also consider that it is important for children to keep themselves busy and learn to play or have a good time on their own. My grandson likes to be with me and we have a very good time together but sometimes we are on differente things. he likes coloring, playing with play-dogh and reading (or looking at) books. Not only is it good but it has to be practice so that they learn how to handle their time.
ouroboros, i think it is a good idea for a baby having those stations. Baby not only play with their hands but also like to watch the ceinling, the walls or their surroundings. My grandson liked viewing the paintings on the wall when we were at friends house.
The issue here is to keep a balance because babies also learn through interaction and we need to talk, sing, hug them a lot and not to be kept to much time alone.
I am also a believer that babies should be given the opportunity to entertain themselves.
I found that starting them out playing on a rug near where I was working gave them the security to start to explore on their own and we could build up gradually. I have to admit that my fourth daughter has been a breeze. From about 4 months she has wanted to be down on the floor amongst her sisters playing and would cry to be put down. Now she toddles off with them and only wants me to feed. A huge difference to my third daughter who is still more clingy even at 3 years.
Thank McDume, just give me a call when you have your grandkids and i will gladly take care of them. :laugh: :laugh:
I am thinking on starting a babies daycare when i retire. I have to ask waterdreamer for help. lol
Oh being clingy sometimes is not bad, you also have to appreciate that. This weekend my grandson was feeling sick sith cold and a little fever and from time to time he look at me with that lovely face as asking me to carry and embrace him. You can not imagine the joy that holding him and embracing him wiht all my strength brings me.
Someday you will be grandparent and will remember me.