Hi Brillkids Moms,
My son just turned two and he still likes feeding. I allow him to do it right before nap time and sleeping time as it helps him sleep but he wants other times too. I have tried so hard to restrict those other times of feeding. I have milk for him in a sippy cup and ask him to finish that before he comes during those other times but he fusses so much. I do not budge even though my heart melts. If I allow, I always do it before he gets to extreme fussy stage or distract him and wait till he asks again as I donât want to encourage stubborn behavior.
Did any one else have this problem, at what age do you draw a line? If you donât draw a line, do they stop eventually? I thought Iâll stop when he is two as two is big but weâre not there yet. When did you stop feeding?
This is never a problem for us outside as he is too detracted then. He is not too clingy or sticky boy either so even that is not a problem. He is attached to dad and sister too.
His diet is fine, he likes to eat meals with his big sister and snacks too with her. Big sister drinks milk in her cup all the time.
I read to him and do cards with him and puzzles so it is not that we are lacking mommy and me time.
You appear to be sending him mixed messages. You are eastern willing to feed him or you are not. Decide when is ok by you and when isnât and stick with a firm answer Every time he asks. If you only want to feed before bed then always feed him in the bedroom. Then he will know a feed in other places is not allowed. If you sometimes give in he is going to be confused.
I fed mine until 11 months ( self weaned) 13 months and 15 months. I weaned them because I personally had had enough. They were quite mobile and I didnât like them pulling at my clothes to undress me. They were getting plenty of nutrition in their diet so I opted out.
Some kids self wean others never will.
I agree with Manda. He is old enough to understand the circumstances. If he asks stick to your guns and say No. He can only nurse before sleeps. Donât waiver from this rule. Ans be expected to tell him over and over.
We are going through something similar. My almost 4 year old is an avid thumb sucker. Personally it doesnât bother me. But I have issues with the hygiene aspect, especially in social situations. So we have created a stringent rule that he is only able to suck his thumb before going to sleep. We donât have to fight the issue, and he knows what he can do.
I think nursing is a similar habit to break.
My oldest stopped nursing at about 11 months, I was pregnant and she told me she did not like the changed taste of milk. After she told me this, she did not nurse a single time :yes:
My second boy nursed till 23 months. I was pregnant again and we were traveling extensively and I needed to stop nursing because I was getting exhausted physically. With him we just explained to him that it is the time to start âsaving mommies milk for the next babyâ and that he is a big boy now. We told him he can continue coming and cuddling with mommy when he was going to sleep, but that milk was not there anymore. That cuddle time made all the difference and he had no problem with stopping. If it wouldnât have been for being very pregnant I would have continued nursin hm though.
We never forced weaning, it was self weaning first time, and gentle suggestion - the second time around. I think clear gentle communication works the best.
Thanks everyone. I donât want to force weaning and that is what I feel I am doing. He gets really pushy about it. I have tried different flavored in his cup milk but max he will take it is once, if he even finishes it. I have tried cuddling and letting him have a bottle but he doesnât like it. So hard. I have been trying to reduce the servings, Iâll just keep at it. Thanks again.
I have been in the same boat as you. My daughter is currently a two and a half and she still love it, but we managed to restricted it to before and after a nap and night sleep. Occasionally during the other time, but itâs rare. What helped us is we moved houses and I took advantage of that to create a new rule, that we only nurse in bed (which is upstairs). We would always go upstairs whenever she wanted it, but after about a month she seemed to forget about nursing when we were playing downstairs and soon enough it started to be every 2 then 3 then 4 hours, and now just before and after naps and sleep. I also stopped âentertainingâ her during nursing (no reading books, no stories, no singing etc.) in order to make this time quiet and boring ;). She still asks about it from time to time, which is usually when she is thirsty. I offer her water, she drinks and if she still wants I say that we do it later before sleep (that usually works). If it doesnât work I will go with her upstairs. We have some toys in bedroom and she usually got distracted and forget why we went there.
So my suggestion is try to create on rule where it is, get your little one get used to it, and then you can gently suggest maybe later, or that we only do it before sleep. Also offer drinks, as mine usually is thirsty when she wants to nurse during the day. She stills associate it with satisfying her thirst. Sometimes some juicy fruit like orange, grapes or melon works well too.
Hi, e8080, Does your daughter get her milk servings? Mine doesnât seem to like milk. I tried milk with fat to no fat and no difference. How do you get her to drink her milk?
We donât buy juice because of the sweetness and lack of freshness. I make fresh juice but only in the evening and he loves it.
My other concern is teeth problems with drinking milk after bedtime, are concerned bout that too? With my daughter, first born, I was so much of a stickler ;). Thanks dearâŚ
Mine doesnât like milk either, I tried all different types (cows, goats, full fat, low fat) but she just doesnât like it. She fortunately likes cheese, especially mozzarella, and yoghurt, so I make sure she eats some nearly every day. We also add some rice or almond or hemp milk to the porridge, but she doesnât want to drink them either, but accepts it in porridge. She would accept probably cows milk in porridge too, but I eat it as well and I donât want to eat cows milk, as it sometimes upsets my stomach. So I think she gets enough of her calcium and other vitamins and minerals from dairy. I actually met quite a few mums with kids who doesnât drink milk either. During the day she usually only drinks water and she is happy with it. Again it took a loooong time for her to actually satisfy her thirst with water. I was offering her water since she was 6 months and only around 2 years old she actually started drinking bigger amounts of it. I even bought the same type of cup as one of her best friends because she seemed to like it. Now she is happy with it. She drinks juice diluted with water sometimes. When she didnât want to drink water before she was 2 I tried other drinks with her (juice, juice with water, tea, milk etc.) but she seemed to prefer only mummies milk. Then we started going out more, as just before she turned two we made a rule that she have breast milk only at home, so that was the time when she actually learnt to like to drink water, or water with juice, especially if we met up with some other toddlers. They run a lot and become thirsty quickly. She saw them drinking from cups and bottles and she was also thirsty from running and then she drunk some and then some more and more. And actually only after drinking a lot outside of the home she started to drink more also at home.
As far as the teeth are concerned I read so much that I came to have no opinion about what causes cavities. I make sure we brush teeth 1-2 times a day, and I avoid sticky food and sweets(including dry fruit) and other commercially made sweets plus we try to have a varied diet, which with strong willed toddler can be tricky sometimes. And if at some point it turns out that she has some teeth problem, then I will decide to be more rigid with no food after brushing teeth and I think it will be also easier to explain her why not.
Milk isnât a necessary part of a diet. Humans are the only mammals that drink milk beyond infancy.
What is essential is the calcium and vitamin D. You can use other foods to reach the acceptable amount. Other dairy products such as cheese and yogurt are a good source. But fish like salmon and broccoli are good also. There are also calcium fortified Orange juices. Worst case scenario⌠An anti acid or other calcium supplement will meet her needs.
I donât drink milk. I havenât since I was a very young child. I have no calcium deficiency.
I nursed my guy until a few months through my pregnancy with my second and stopped at that point because I didnât want to be nursing two. He was about two years four months. I couldnât tell from your post if you wanted to stop breast feeding because you were done or if you thought you should stop. If the the latter, it is natural to continue breast feeding past two and very good for the child for nutrition and bonding. People tend to stopearlier more for cultural reasons but most kids would continue to nurse if it was their choice. I wanted to wean at about one year, but I talked to another mom and she helped me realize that I was just feeling like I should wean and that I didnât really need to If I was still okay doing it. And that by continuing I was giving my baby a great gift.
Of course my baby was a lot younger than yours at that point. And after awhile, I really was done. Personally I didnât like being undressed in public so I partially weaned my guy to prior to nap and bedtime. I distracted him with a smoothie when he wanted to nurse and eventually would tell him It is not time for milk. You can have milk before bed. When I was ready to completely wean I started to tell him a few days before that I was running out of milk because he was such a big boy and had drunk it all up. Then on the day I was going to wean him We bought him a cake and a present and congratulated him for being a big boy. He asked once before bed that night and I reminded him that he had already drunk all the milk and he was fine with it. Lucky for me, because I had no plan B!
Hi,
mybabyian: Actually it is latter, I am not sure if I should stop due to his age, as I donât know the effects of forced weening or the disadvantages are of feeding till this age or any advantages ;). I only anticipated doing it till age 2 ;). He might be my last baby. I donât want to have memories of forced weaning. I would rather understand why he wants to continue more and work with him in finding a replacement.
Thanks everyone for the advice. I think we reached a middle ground. Instead of sippy cup, I tried an open cup on the table and fill it constantly with milk and a little flavor along with straw in it. I said no to feeding apart from napping and night time. He is now finishing his cups. He disliked sippy cup as they donât clean very well and the milk would spoil faster.
I think there are definite nutritional advantages to extended breastfeeding. I am not sure how big though if he has an otherwise healthy diet (with omega 3). There may be emotional benefits too, but I think you can fulfill those needs with lots of love. I think as long as you let him know when it is okay to have milk you wonât do any emotional harm. Sounds like you have it figured out.
When you are ready to completely wean, somebody told me she put bandaids on her nipples and told her kids she had ouchies so she couldnât give them milk. She said it worked for 4 kids.
Hi,
Mybabyian, definitely will try bandages idea. Thanks. I tried putting a bitter taste but that so did not work:p
I do give omega3 with cold liver oil.
I agree with the other moms. You just need to be firm and set boundaries. It may break your heart to see him cry but it will only last a few days at most. You can get through it.
I allow him to do it right before nap time and sleeping time as it helps him sleep but he wants other times too. I have tried so hard to restrict those other times of feeding. I have milk for him in a sippy cup and ask him to finish that before he comes during those other times but he fusses so much. I do not budge even though my heart melts. If I allow, I always do it before he gets to extreme fussy stage or distract him and wait till he asks again as I donât want to encourage stubborn behavior.