My grandson is starting to give some signs of bad behavior (tantrums) that may be because of jealous. For example when i pick him as usual on Thursdays he didn’t want to come to his father’s house. It was just after my son talk to him in the phone (having to leave a working meeting) that he came down. He had never done this before because usually he likes very much to be with us.
This time he said that he wanted to stay with the maid which by the way is a new girl. His mother change the one he had last week.
I wanted to share with you because i feel that in part its also my fault since this days i have a lot of work and i have been spending more time with my daughter and not paying so much attention to him. On the other hand he turn 4 on january and from some days i feel he those not like early learning as before.
Maybe all that is not really the issue and the main situation here is:
My grandson (son of my son) seems to be jealous because not only my granddaughter was born (daughter of my daughter) on 21 February but also the granddaughter of the other grandmother (by his mother) was born yesterday February 23.
This looks like a tongue twister.
Last week he was the only one and now he has 2 new born cousins.
Any ideas on what we can do?
This is a difficult age. I think my twins are about the same age as your grandson and they have also been very jealous of each other lately. I try to play lots of funny games that involve contact (think Playful Parenting), and give them a name so the kids know how to ask to play. Here are some examples of our favorites:
• Tickle Bee: I point my finger, pretending it is a stinger, and hold it in front of my nose while circling it. Then I chase them around while making buzzing noises, occasionally I will catch them and pretend to sting them. Remember to breath if you try this one, it is very easy to get caught up in the buzzing and forget.
• Secrets: Whisper in their ears; usually nonsense but I will also tell them “I love you.â€
• Rock-A-Bye Baby: a classic nursery rhyme but my kids love it. Maybe this would be very therapeutic for him if he could pretend and see what it is like to be a baby held in arms. He is probably very curious.
I would also suggest making special plans with him and go do something new and exciting. One of our favorite places to visit is the pet store, which they seem to like as much as going to the zoo. We are fortunate to have an exotic pet store nearby that has open cages and allows them to touch the animals which is why I think it is such a huge hit.
Try to spend special, quality time with just him. Do something really fun, or something he likes to do. The key is just to make him think he is the only kid in the world and that he has all of your attention.
Have a game day. Just play games all day. My son loves playing board games.
Give him special chores to help out with the baby to make him feel important. Like let him be the diaper or wipe grabber. He can get the diaper and wipes out when the baby needs changing. Or anything that can be a special job just for him.
Thanks for your advise. I bought ‘Playful Parenting’ after reading good comments about it in this forum and think i have to start reading it.
Maybe what you recomend Twinergy about the games is what a was missing. That can bring us closer togehter and as nhockaday says it is quality time and a good opportunity of showing how important is for me to play with him and have a good time.
He haven’t seen the baby yet because the days he came, we had a cold so maybe next week will be the first time. Nevertheless he knows his cousins (from father and mother’s sisters) are born and he listens talk about them. He saw a picture of my granddaughter and said ‘Que linda bebe’. He likes babise very much and i am sure that they will et alone very well.
It is just that i have to keep your advice in mind to prevent negative reactions.
BTW twindergy, what nice picture of your twins.
Thanks to both again.